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    11/12/2008

    I am tired..

      文/蝎子      

     
                                                                                  

         最近很累,莫名其妙的累。

         也許是煩心事過多,也許是工作不愉快,也許是自己想的太多,總是我很累,很想休息。可是我怎麼都休息不夠,每天一下班我就回家,連片都不看了沖個澡就直接睡覺,很經常一躺下就睡著了,只是半夜會一直醒過來,醒了繼續強制自己睡覺,睡了又醒,醒了又睡,如此的反復,如此的失眠。 夢太多了,一個接著一個,做完一個又一個,關於什麼自己都不清楚,也許連夢也成了習慣,至我懂事以來只要一睡著了便開始沉入夢境當中,虛幻的、真實的、模糊的、清晰的、遺忘的...... 夢裡,我不知道我是誰...... 夢裡,我在逃避著什麼...... 夢裡,我又在追尋著什麼......

         每天早上起床後總會覺得特別地累,覺得自己似乎永遠都沒有睡飽一樣。本是一天假日,原本計畫著想要怎樣怎樣地去放鬆自己,給自己一個快樂的假日。吃完早飯發現自己哪都不想去,只想安靜地,好好地睡上一覺。感覺去哪都沒有意思,哪都勾不起我的興致了。似乎一切都沒有意義,只有睡覺,沉入睡覺當中才是我所追求的。 之後還是如往常一樣,怎麼都睡不著,或者是睡著了一會模模糊糊地又醒了過來。 晚上很晚起床後覺得自己很餓,於是開始尋找食物,卻發現自己一點胃口都沒有,沒有任何食欲,什麼都不想吃。

         現在每天大部分的時間都像個陀螺似的在公司不停地轉,從太陽東升,轉到西沉。天氣不好的時候沒有太陽,就從零晨的夜,轉到夜晚的黑。...白天不懂夜的黑,披星起床戴月下班的我,都快不懂晝的白了。

         都說壓力會產生動力,可壓力過大,超出一個人的承受範圍之後就只會讓人崩潰。

    Comments (1)

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    Picture of Anonymous
    CZG wrote:
    我最近也很累耶。。白天辛苦,晚上还会做梦,简直就是惨不忍睹。。。不过我记得有人说过,人活着就是很累的嘛,所以咬牙坚持下去吧。。
    Nov. 12

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